Aging Well:
Practical, theological reasons to value older people
July
17, 2012 Posted by Missy Buchanan, UMR Columnist
Sometimes you read something that sends chills down your spine. It happened
recently when I read the words of Stephen Sapp, chair of religious studies at
the University of Miami in Coral Cables, Fla., and former chair of the
governing council for the Forum on Religion, Spirituality and Aging:
“People in the United States don’t like old people, and church folks are not
particularly different. Despite decades of awareness of ageism and strong
emphasis on battling all other ‘isms,’ old people (with the exception of
lawyers and politicians) remain the only identifiable group that is perfectly
acceptable to disparage, ridicule and demean in ‘polite company.’”
Dr. Sapp boldly makes the case that if jokes were made about race or gender
the way they are about older adults, the church would be up in arms. He
suggests that one reason our youth-obsessed culture has a distaste for old
people is that old people on some level confront us with what awaits most of us
as we age.
Americans do not want to get old and we certainly don’t want to acknowledge
that we will die. Even images of “healthy” or “successful” aging promote the
idea that one must hang onto youth for as long as possible, an inherent
devaluation of old age.
Dr. Sapp insists that clergy are among the worst in terms of acknowledging
their own mortality. “I have encountered more resistance from clergy to facing
aging than anybody else, and my colleagues who also work in the field of
religion and aging all report the same experience,” he says.
Too much gerontology literature, including Christian, sugarcoats the losses
inherent in aging, he says. From a theological perspective, Christians ought to
be wonderfully equipped to provide real help in the area of aging, but
unfortunately we have bought into the dominant American values and have trouble
addressing issues about aging in a religious way.
Dr. Sapp believes we do older people a disservice when we paint too golden a
picture of aging, one that few people will be able to achieve. We begin to
believe what culture tells us, that being a worthy human means we have complete
rationality, are economically productive and are absolutely independent—things
that aging undermines if we live long enough.
When it comes to church growth, Dr. Sapp rejects the idea that attracting
young families is the only answer. He expresses disappointment about the
church’s slow response to the obvious demographic shift to an aging population.
He points to statistics that indicate if churches did nothing but attract
people 65 and older, there are enough in the pipeline from that age group to
double church membership every five years for the next 40 years or so.
By the year 2040, he says, there will be more 85-year-olds than
five-year-olds. He wonders how the church will attract people 65 and older when
it offers so little for elders and generally doesn’t want them.
Dr. Sapp says the typical American attitude about aging frames the
conversation as a competition between young and old, and he dismisses the idea
that if the church is to maintain its appeal to younger people it must neglect
old people. Instead he emphasizes that what’s needed is the recognition that we
are all aging together. It is one thing every human being shares.
As the body of Christ, we should remember that we are all in this together,
he adds. The church ought to be the one institution in our society that lets no
one forget that.
Ms. Buchanan, a member of FUMC Rockwall, Texas, is the author of several
books, including Aging Faithfully: 28 Days of Prayer (Upper Room
Books). Reach her at: missy@missybuchanan.com.
